On the battlefield

On the battlefield,with bombs bursting and bullets flying everywhere men are pinned down. No ammo,no defenses their leader is pleading for help.

We're being clobbered and we need help. Send us some weapons or something. I've already lost 7 men. How many more do we have to lose?

We'd love to help you out but we can't.

Why not?

Because if we use violence we will be playing into their hands and we will become no better than they are. They use violence in fact they use it more than organized crime. In fact more of our guys are dead at their hands than any other group. If we do that we are no better off.

We need to defend ourselves.

Don't you understand? If you defend yourselves they will say you are oppressing them and they will scream "oppression". Don't you understand? Everyone will believe them because the media says that men who don't allow women to kill them are "misogynistic". Do you think that guy over there in the miniskirt is going to support a bunch of misogynists. Certainly not. Besides we have an image to think of. Think of the PR.

That PR makes us look like wussies.

Nonsense,if you are nice they are nice. Look at the accomplishments of blacks during the '30's,40's and 50's. Look at the great accomplishments of Neville Chamberlain. You need to look at the big picture. History will reward us for being nice and everyone will respect us for taking to high road "go along to get along".

What did any of them accomplish?

Blacks were able to finally wag their fingers and say "bad Klanperson","bad Klanperson" and Neville Chamberlain accomplished peace in our time. Remember this: when in doubt take the Walter Mondale route.

What?

The thing is we must think of our PR and our image. Taking the high road of doing nothing we deescalate the situation. You have to trust us. Returning violence for violence is like watching sports. No man wants anything to do with either. Like I said you have to trust us on this. We've been taking this route for a long time and only 500 misandric bills have gotten past us.

Did we at least try to reach out to anyone neutral for help?

And be labeled "misogynist"? Are you kidding? We may never get laid again.



What do we do?

We'll send General George Armstrong Custer to help you. You'll do fine. Trust us.

The leader gets off the phone and one of his men asks:

Sir,what did they say?

They told us to trust them.

What does that mean,sir?

"Trust us" is another way of saying "fuck you".

And the battle and the war rage on and on.